Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Moon Museum, Tattoos, Red Sox, Michael Jackson

I was with my family and we went to an AWESOME museum exhibit on moons. Everyone got a free action figure and a little boy asked if he could trade with me. I said yes. Also there was a large photo on the wall - a collage of various people hanging out with the "red sox coach" and it included a picture of me eating pancakes with him. I bragged a bit about that, and a girl got annoyed. I was with Reem and we skipped most of the museum and talked about boys and she cried because a boy was not getting her published like he said he would. We were talking with my family and my mouth was full of pins and coffee grinds, so I excused myself to take care of that.

Then I was in a classroom situation, and we had a special guest - Michael Jackson! He sat down next to me. He was really nice. I was so flustered - MICHAEL JACKSON is sitting next to me! A girl was like, "What's your problem?" since I was all blush-y and I was like, "Michael Jackson!!!" and she looked at me like I was stupid. I quickly updated my facebook status to let people know I was sitting next to Michael Jackson in class. A few people wrote things like, "Not funny" and I realized that MJ has been dead. This was not the actual Michael Jackson, but a guy who kind of looked like him and sounded like him. And everyone else was smart enough to get that but me.

Then I was in a tattoo shop where my girlfriend worked. There was drama - the boss announced new pay rates and they sucked. My gf and her colleague told me about a big screw-up they had. They were doing a piece on a "cheerleader who was a Green Bay Packers fan who had lots of metal work in her mouth". The piece was a "bowl of chili" and it looked like it was sliding off of her. I asked if the girl paid for it and they laughed and were like, "Yeah right." (this last part is from watching LA Ink).

Saturday, April 17, 2010

The "F" in Family

So I was hanging out with a bunch of random people, including the significant other of an ex-boss of mine who I never knew too well in real life. She was talking about how families suck and was like, "We all know what the "F" in family stands for, but what about the rest of it?" We came up with "F.uckin' A....(M)...I.ll-mannered, L.oud (Y)." I don't remember the M or the Y. Somehow there was a list of adjectives with first letters that spelled out "family." And it was really funny and clever. Stupid families!

Friday, April 16, 2010

Bathtub of Boys and Beans

My hub Mike (M1), our friends Mike (M2) and Andy & I were chilling one evening and M1 & I suggested that we all take a bath together.  It was super casual in my dream world, like asking if we should have a fire in the fire pit.  I think the idea was basically a poor-man's hot tub.  So the boys get down to swim trunks and I'm in a bra and undies and we're wedged in our tub together, all in a row (M1 in front, then me, then Andy, then M2 caboose-ing it).  How sad.  Andy said he'd like to make some beans for us to share as a snack.  He had this dehydrated bean mixture (like a packet of oatmeal) and planned to pour it into the tub, expecting that it would hydrate into a nice little floating pile of refried beans.  I didn't think it would work out this way and before I could warn him against the idea, I saw M2 behind him with dehydrated bean mess floating around everywhere.  It was gross and the end result was the four of us steeping in a tub of refried beans.  The end!