Basically a Big Party

I was in a coffee shop with Anna, ordering lattes. When we got them, they were like giant chocolate milkshakes, but runny, which is perfect because sometimes milkshakes are too cold for my teeth. We turned to sit down at a table when I saw an old friend of mine out of the corner of my eye. He wore a white lab coat and disappeared around a corner.

"Namir?" I called as I followed him. He peered out from a doorway and replied "Yeeessss??" while at the same time, my cousin Laith peered out from a doorway across the hall, also wearing a white lab coat and saying "Yeeessss??" Laith was also pointing at his head insistently. He had shaved it bald. He smiled like a damn fool.

They both faded out and my guitar teacher appeared. He was wearing an adorable yellow bowtie and a black porkpie hat. I got excited and started to say to him "You look so nice..." but then I realized he was wearing a white sweat suit as well, so I finished with "...from the shoulders up!" The sweatshirt and sweatpants had two different colleges written on them; one was written in blue and one in black. He then put on a suit over the sweatsuit. The suit was black with pinstripes and was giant.

I returned to Anna and drank the rest of my latte milkshake. It had weird chunks at the bottom which I drank as I thought to myself "I may regret this in a moment."

I began singing the song "Nasty" by Janet Jackson. When I sang, the entire song came out of my mouth, drums and synth and voice and everything. As I sang, Anna and other people in the coffee shop started dancing. As I danced, I realized Will Smith was dancing right behind me. I kept singing and we formed a sort of demented conga line, just the two of us. When I got to the verse of the song, I somehow switched into "Rhythm Nation," which I didn't realize until I got to the chorus. I tried to do the Rhythm Nation dance, but my hands were full with a a giant box full of firecrackers. Here's what I missed out on:

'Sup, says Obama

I dreamed that I was chosen to interview President Obama at Beloit College, where I went to school. I don't know why I was picked, but it was mostly because I was an alumni and I had some connection with a professor. Unfortunately, I didn't prepare any questions, so I was scrambling to come up with something within the 20 minutes before the interview was to take place. I also couldn't find any blank sheets of paper - the notebook I had was full of paper, but every page had writing on it. I also had a lot os loose papers stuck in the notebook, but they were all written on as well. I did have two pens and a pencil, though.

I showed up on campus - drove my jeep up a windy road on a hill as it rained and I looked for an umbrella. Campus looked different from how I remember it, more like the campus of the school where my sister went to college. I was surprised that I didn't have to go through any type of security.

I stood in the lobby of Eaton Chapel, where the interview was to take place, and where I took all my music classes as an undergraduate. While we waited for Obama to show up, I gave a tour to an older woman. I can't remember who she was, but she could either be one of my old professors, or a member of Obama's family. I showed her around the building, and was trying to show her the dark staircase in the back of the building that comes up backstage (I had this idea of us coming out from backstage and her being met with a beautiful view of the chapel from the stage) but it was pitch black and there were heavy cords all over the ground, and I was convinced she was going to trip.

Then I was back in the lobby and Obama showed up, walking casually through the door by himself. "'Sup," he said to me, and moved on. I didn't tell him I was going to interview him.

We moved up on to the stage and sat at a small table where we'd do the interview. I still searched frantically for paper. One of my old professors, Ian, sat to my side, just like how a page turner sits next to a pianist. I think maybe he was going to turn pages for me...

I brainstormed some questions to ask him, all the while realizing that I had no idea why kinds of questions to ask. I thought I'd ask him about music, about Iraq, and about his daughters. Sarah whispered in my ear at some point, "Ask him about eating chicken and being a Veggie." Before I got to answer any questions, the people in charge started moving us to our next location. They'd just been taking pictures all along. I hoped I looked good.

Ideal Band

I was watching a band play in the far end of the parking lot across the street from my house. They sort of seemed like a noise band which is weird because I'm definitely not into noise, and I was really into this band. They had posted a "rule" on a sign behind them: nobody is allowed to wear masks in the audience unless they were sick or were afraid of getting sick or they were going to an amusement park where they might get sick. I thought of those blue paper surgical masks.

This band was scheduled to play here from 7 pm - 8 pm, and then they were supposed to play at The Inferno from 8:30 - 9:30. I planned on going over there, but I must have taken too long because when I was finally leaving my house, it was already 9:30. I decided to go anyway to check out the second band.

Thank god I did. You know who it was? Effing Axl Rose and Slash, backed up by The Bitter Tears. Basically, this combination makes my favorite band ever. I watched them in a room with only about 20 other people, and got a great view right up front. During their last song, Slash and Axl stood in the center of the stage playing music while the four members (Alan, Mike, Tony, and a girl with glasses that I'd never seen before) did organized, choreographed dances in a square around them. The Bitter Tears rotated places every 4-8 bars of music and faced inward, towards Axl and Slash. They did a lot of grand movements with their hands, and they were able to play their instruments at the same time. Their eyes were all very focused on Axl and Slash.

At the end of their last song, Axl ran into the "back room" where apparently there was an audience of about 200, so I decided not to fight my way back there. Some guy announced the next band, which turned out to be the band of Toby from The Office. That was a sold out show, so I didn't even have a choice in whether or not I wanted to go. Good job, Toby.

Nerdy Shark Spits Up My Bones

I don't know if I was watching something or if I was actually in the situation because everything that happened didn't affect me. I was in the water, right next to a wooden dock. There was a shark swimming circles around me. It was saying "darn! darn! darn!" over and over again. I thought that was pretty nerdy so I laughed. The shark promptly swallowed me whole and laughed, but I was still alive and outside the shark somehow. It then spit up "my bones," which was a silver metal oven rack.

Lost My Car in a Dark Garage

I was at Anna's sister's wedding. Anna was the maid of honor, and as I watched her walk up the aisle before her sister, I grabbed my camera to take pictures. It was running out of batteries, so I kept turning it on and trying again, and I got a few mediocre shots out of it.

As I was taking the pictures, I remembered that I was supposed to play a song for the wedding and I didn't have my music with me. Since my music was at my parents' house and the wedding was just a few blocks away, I thought it would be fine for me to leave and run back to their house to get it. I assumed I'd get back to the wedding with no problem.

Then all of a sudden, I was in a giant high-rise parking garage. It was dirty and dingy and dark and scary with a million stairwells, several on each floor, so I couldn't keep track of where I was going. I held my keys tightly in my hand and kept pressing the lock button, which makes my car's horn honk. I could hear it very faintly in the distance. It was very high-pitched. As I climbed the stairs, the sound got harder and harder to hear, so I figured I should go back down. Whenever I got inside a stairwell where I'd be going down the stairs, I was able to jump down the whole thing with my fingers just lightly grazing the handrails. It was sort of like flying, but more so jump-falling in an organized fashion. Make sense?

I searched and searched everywhere, but I could not find my car. I did come across a man wearing a busted up tuxedo. He looked like some kind of cartoonish magician or the villain from an old movie. Crooked mustache, wilted flower in his boutonniere. He was digging through piles of junk, boxes of random things. He implied that he could help me find my car. I searched through the piles with him for a few minutes, turning up some of my own belongings. Then he led me to the base of a stairwell where three other people sat; two grown men and one little girl. "Stay here for 15 minutes," he told me. "Whatever you're looking for will show up."

I sat on the dirty floor and realized the two men and little girl were about to watch a movie. I thought it was probably be too scary for her. I also realized that the tuxedo guy was the owner of the fancy hotel that the parking garage was suddenly attached to, and I wondered how he had time to search through garbage when he had a fancy hotel to run.

Eventually I ended up in the lobby of the hotel, all dirty and standing out in the light of the giant chandeliers. I had not found my car or my music, and I was sure the wedding was long over, but Anna was there and still very nice to me. Hey, thanks for being a good friend, Anna!

Embarrassing Feet

I dreamed I was in my parents' neighbors' kitchen with a family I teach. The 7 year old boy had grown to be as tall as me, which was confusing. I looked down at our feet to see if I was wearing shoes that made me shorter or he was wearing shoes that made him taller. It turned out that I was wearing brown knock-off Birkenstocks with black socks. The mom in the family lifted up my foot to take a closer look. "These are really nice," she said. "Yes, they're knock-off Birkenstocks. I love them," I replied, but I was lying through my teeth. I was mortified to be wearing them. Especially with black socks.

Tomatoes Spanish Boring

In my dream, I had just purchased a can of diced tomatoes. As soon as I got home, I realized there were already three cans in the garage. But it was the garage of my parents' house. I didn't really care.

Also, I could speak Spanish fluently!

Oh wait! I just remembered (I'm adding this a few hours later) that Gwen and I were driving around looking for the tanning salon we had to go to, and when we found out it was in the Princeton Club West, we were both like "gross" and didn't end up going.

Celebrities and More Underwears

In the first part of my dream, I was at a conference in a hotel with my parents and siblings. I don't know what the conference was about, but there were a lot of people dressed in ball gowns. Very glittery and sequin-y and tons of colors, mostly bright pinks and blues and greens. The material of the dresses was usually shiny. So basically, it sort of looked like an Arabic wedding. We argued about wear to park so that we wouldn't have to walk far in the rain.

We were in the lobby of the hotel, gathered around a table full of papers that we were supposed to fill out. The papers were messy and unorganized. I sat at the table with glasses on, trying to find the right form. Just then, somebody walked up to the table and placed a book, standing up, right in the middle. The book was Fatherhood. Which means that the man who put it there was...

BILL COSBY.

For real. He was bigger in person than he is on television. Not taller or fatter, but his proportions were bigger. He was a bigger kind of human than we all were. He smiled as he put the book down, and we somehow knew he was promoting it. Due to my quick wit (duh), I said "Oh, self-promotion, eh?" and Bill and the whole crowd burst into laughter. In all the craziness of laughing, the book fell over on its side, and I grabbed another opportunity at hilarity and yelled "Booooooo!" Bill Cosby laughed and laughed, and I remember thinking "Yes! I got two laughs out of Bill Cosby, and he's a comedian!" Really though, I think I'm much funnier than this in real life.

In the second part of my dream, I was talking to a professor of mine who ended up being Robert Downey Jr (who I've totally had a dream about before). As we were talking, I realized he was getting flirty and that there might be some Sexy Results. He asked me to come back later that night for a "meeting" (yeah right, Downey Jr) so I went to find my friend so we could go home and change. My friend had to keep score at a cheerleading competition, though, so we got held up and I kept looking impatiently at the time, not wanting to miss Sexy Results. The friend keeping score perched on the scoreboard above the gymnasium floor, manually hanging numbers on hooks when points were scored. At some point, she also hung a ten-year-old boy by his shirt from one of the hooks, as a prank. Everybody laughed.

I was sort of horrified until I realized there was a trampoline underneath him, and it was there as a safety precaution because this was all part of a movie we were making. I immediately panicked, wondering if Robert Downey Jr was only in the movie, or if I was going to see him again in real life. I couldn't tell.

Last thing: there was a pair of underwears in the back pocket of my jeans this entire time.

Underwears!

I dreamed that I was shopping with my sister and my mother. We were in my mother's bedroom, which was also a department store. Probably Carson's. My mother kept showing us dresses and they were all shiny and glittery. We had to help her pick out two, but each one kept changing colors and moving, so I couldn't pick one.

My sister sent her into the dressing room, and at the last minute, I realized she'd sent my mother in with a few pair of swimming trunks to try on as well. It made me feel weird. I looked at all the underwear and wanted to buy all of it. In this dream, I kept feeling a lot of love for underwear. All the underwears of all the world.

Reykjavik, mostly

I was at an event where a large group of people were dancing some martial arts style dance.  I was somehow nominated to choose a team of dancers from the group so I had to pay attention to each person and it was a lot of pressure.  Then I was with a group of people from college, at a friend's wedding reception.  Everyone was split up into small rooms and "the cool crowd" was jam-packed into a room.  I decided to boycott the cool crowd because it was so overcrowded and competitive to get a drink and the bride & groom's attention.  I was a little bit pouty about it.

Then I was with a large group of friends and we found out we were going to Reykjavik, Iceland in a few hours.  It was a ridiculous idea but no one wanted to miss the opportunity.  So we got packed up to go.  As we flew over Iceland, I asked "Is this real?" because we were in small planes, the size of about 3 rollercoaster cars.  It was beautiful - clear skies, mountains, a lush green landscape below.  I kept thinking of Bjork and how it made so much sense that she was from here.  It was strange that there was no sign of volcanic ash in the sky and that we were cleared to fly.  I actually thought maybe we were on a 3-D ride at Disneyworld because these planes or helicopters were so small and rollercoaster-like.  They were so small that we were even able to zip through Reykjavik downtown and see shops, restaurants and cobblestone roads.  It looked like a great city.  At the hostel, our group bustled around finding our rooms and settling in.  Reem was there and wanted to watch a Cameron Diaz movie.  She kept asking others if it was a good movie, as she was really skeptical.  But she really wanted to watch it.  I remember thinking how lame it was that I was dreaming about a Cameron Diaz movie instead of dreaming of exploring Reykjavic on account of Reem.

Robert Downey Jr.

I was at a house - I don't know who's house it was, but I was possibly at a party, or babysitting, or something like that. Somebody told me, or I realized, that they were shooting a movie just a few houses away, and that Robert Downey Jr. was there. I immediately took off running, which is really cool because usually I can't run in dreams. I ran through the backyard of my aunt and uncle's house in Illinois, which seemed giant and like a jungle. There was mowed grass and flowers everywhere. Without stopping, I bent down to pick up a cut yellow rose that still had a ton of leaves attached to it and I kept running. I ran through all their neighbors' yards, going around wells and jumping over piles of sticks.

I finally got to the place they were filming, which was a big fancy hotel. In the lobby, there was a huge, oval-shaped fountain or some kind of structure that contained tons of plant life, little garden statues, and waterfalls, amongst other things. I ran around it a few times, but Robert Downey Jr. was always on the opposite site as I was. Finally, I reached him. They were in the middle of filming, but he stopped when he saw me and said "I'll always meet somebody!" I handed him the yellow rose and said "Thank you. Thank you for what you do." Then I ran back in the direction from which I came.

Later, I was mad that I hadn't stayed longer, because it seemed like he was friendly and would have talked to me more. When I saw my friends and family, I totally lied and told them all that Robert Downey Jr. had kissed me on the cheek. What a liar!


Such a fox!

Beefy Noodles

Last night I had a dream that Tara made me dinner in my high school. She made "Beef Noodles" or "Beefy Noodles" or something like that. It had three ingredients, one of which I can't remember. The other two were giant wide noodles which were really thick and beef that was the same shape as the noodles. Tara told me that before you cook the beef, you have to slice it in long diagonal lines with the knife moving towards you. Otherwise, it wouldn't taste as good after it was cooked.

There wasn't enough time to eat more than two bites together, which is very similar to the fact that there's never enough time for Tara and I to talk on the phone. Lame.

New Office Episode - "Survey Day"

I dreamed an entire episode of The Office. It was called "Survey Day," and all the characters were in it, including me! For most of the episode, there were a ton of businessmen in the lobby for a big meeting, and they were all sitting around in suits and carrying briefcases. I remember Meredith and Kelly being all excited about "all the men." I saw Jim sandwiched between a bunch of other businessmen, and, of course, he was making faces at the camera.

At one point, I was in a giant elevator with Pam and I'd left my purse in the lobby, so we had to go up and don a lot to go get it. The elevator had two separate entrances right next to each other, but about ten feet apart. The elevator was like a room in itself, with plants and bookshelves everywhere.

Part of the whole big meeting involved everybody filling out surveys, hence "Survey Day." Each person had a personalized survey with their name on it and questions specific to their lives and jobs. I couldn't find mine, so I decided to fill in all the answers as three-word phrases, like "Haste Makes Waste," and also with Metallica album titles, like "Ride the Lightning."

In the dream, I kept having to double-check to make sure this episode hadn't happened before.

Now is Not the Time, Ozzy Osbourne.

The other night, I had a really long-seeming dream. I meant to write it down last week but I forgot, so here are some of the details I remember:

I was with my cousin Tony's wife, Jill, and she was driving a van in the neighborhood of my work. She and I and a few other people kept trying to get somewhere, but we seemed to just stay in the same area, still driving. At one point, she brought us to her apartment in Madison, which was very long. She also had two dogs that were blonde and furry. As I looked at them, I thought to myself, "they're just like ____ (in my mind, a combination of bears ad pigs), but much fluffier!"

Later, I was back in the van with Rob, who I know here in Madison. We were with a third person who I didn't know at the time. The third person said he needed to make a stop. We pulled over near these condos on the same street on which I work and he got out. Rob and I were talking, but out of the corner of my eye I saw the third guy standing outside the condos. It was Ozzy Osbourne! He was wearing all black with round, black sunglasses, and he was aiming his remote car starter at a window on the 2nd or 3rd floor. I immediately recognized that as "the sign" for buying pot. Specifically from this guy who's a concert promoter here in town. "Hey!" I yelled indignantly. "He doesn't get to buy pot now! I've got to get to work!"

I was in a hurry to leave, so I figured I'd get out of the van and walk the 8 blocks to work. As I left, Rob gave me a gift - a tennis ball covered in rainbow-colored confetti and streamers.

Applebees?!

My dream this morning was so confusing. I was in my parents' family room, laying on the floor beneath two giant comforters; one was the black and white one I have here in Madison, the other was the rainbow-colored hearts one that Sara had on her bed as a kid and is now in my parents' storage room in the basement. I was half trying to sleep and half trying to find several electronics, including my gray hair dryer, my red cd player, and a few other things with long and tangled cords. Everything was all messed up and confusing under the comforters and I couldn't find anything I wanted - I was so frustrated.

During one of the moments in which I was trying to sleep, however, my mom entered the room through the door from the garage, all dressed in a smart black and white pinstriped skirt suit. She said "I'll be back from work around 10:45." But I couldn't figure out if she was talking about AM or PM, and whether it was AM or PM at the moment.

As I kept wishing I could sleep, I noticed that the rest of my family had entered the area. Dad stayed in the kitchen, reading the paper I think. Emil and Sara were both in the family room. Sara was cooking breakfast at the stove (which was also in the family room), which made me believe it was AM. She was also talking to herself a lot as she stared at the pan on the stove, saying things like "No, I won't have one. Okay I will. Just put it aside for me. I don't know, I'm not sure. Just get one for yourself. Put that one over there." I looked at Emil, confused, and asked why she was talking to herself. To which he replied "It's probably because she used to live at that Applebee's." Sara turned to us and said "Oh yeah, I remember, with like 5 other people."

So confusing.

make-ups

Last night I dreamt that Reem and I were at a Sephora type store looking specifically for foundation. Trouble was that each brand only had like one bottle of foundation. Some were in locked cases. There were not an array of skin tones, it was like you just had to wander around and hope to find a brand that happened to have a bottle of foundation that was close to your skin tone. So I asked a very gay store clerk (Latino wearing mandarin collar leather jacket) why there were no brands with a selection of foundation. He said "Well after 9-11 women just stopped buying foundation".

Later Reem and I were looking around and the gay store clerks were like freaking out over how good her eye shadow looked. And it DID look great. In my dream I was thinking "WOW Reem combined so many elements and it really makes her eyes look beautiful". What Reem had done was put a different color of eye shadow on each eyelid. On one eye was bright blue on the other was a green blue. She had then blended some grey in the corners and over it she put this very sheer grey silver glitter.

After that in my dream I came to the realization that I look a lot better in more of a matte or stain lip stick than I do in a gloss.

I think that might be true in real life.

Golf and TMI

In my dream, I had concrete proof as to why golf was so sucky. I have no idea what it was.

I also dreamed I had a UTI (TMI, right?) and the doctor called my mom to tell her about it. My Dad perscribed me some medicine and I had to drive an hour over a bridge that looked like the Golden Gate Bridge to the area south of Chicago. The sky and lake were sparkling blue and everything was beautiful, but the UTI really made it all annoying.

A Shot of Crystal Meth

The other night I had a dream that I was with my friend Wendy, standing on the front stoop of somebody's house. This guy I know cam up to us, looking all shady, and held out a tiny silver shot glass. It was "a shot of crystal meth" and Wendy and I were supposed to share it. I decided not to take it, since I had to go to work soon. I'm so boring...

Nothing Better to Do

I was at some kind of school assembly that was taking place in a big field. There were hundreds of chairs organized in very neat rows, and a big square stage at the center of them all. I sat down in a row right behind some of my friends. Some music started playing, and even though I didn't recognize it, I knew when to begin singing and what lyrics and tune to sing. As soon as I started singing, I realized it was "Rosanna" by Toto. I looked up to check out the band that was playing it, and realized the lead singer of this band was the actual lead singer from the band Toto! I thought to myself, "he probably has nothing better to do." Also, he looked nothing like him in real life.

Later, my row of chairs was removed from the group by some kind of forklift, and then I was in the car with my brother Emil and cousin Luai, looking for a wedding gift for a cousin of ours in London. We drove to a part of Madison I'd never been to. There were several Arabic stores and a Home Depot. The street name started with the letter B. Emil picked out an ugly necklace as a gift, which I didn't really like, but I kept my mouth shut because I was bored and wanted to leave the store.

The Brother Totonchi

I dreamed that I was meeting Emil, Reem's brother (and Sarah's, though I've not yet met Sarah either), for the very first time.  For some reason I was in a hurry and really did not have time for this visit but thought I'd pop in briefly.  When I got there (Reem's place?), they were sitting around a tv.  I was introduced and then said that I had to get going pretty soon.  Emil begged me to stay, saying that we had to play some video game together.  I don't especially enjoy being put on the spot to play video games I've never played with people who play them all the time (in awake life) but I didn't want to be rude.  I stayed and played a game or two and Emil was soooo happy.  He was smiley and bouncy.