Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Scary Tarantula Sex

I dreamed that me and D. had 2 pet tarantulas. At first there were 3 in one cage, but later just 2. One was the male and it was much larger than the other. I hated them but mostly the big male. Plus he looked a little squished. I asked D. why we could not set it loose outside? She explained that the climate here was not suitable for the tarantula and it would die either by man or nature. It was scary. Then I saw the 2 tarantulas mating. The male was on top of the female. He put his claws which looked like needles slowly into holes which were in her back. The holes would fill with blood, then he'd pull the needle out, and put it in another hole. I was very concerned that this was not a consensual act, but then saw she was doing the same thing to him. Later there was a ghost in my room and the tarantulas were under the bed. Everything was very scary!

Then it turned into a boring work dream and I dreamed about students I worked with several years ago. They were having a cooking competition and I ate their food. I remember thinking that when they were MY students, we never had anything as good as this cooking competition.

Friday, March 20, 2009

facebook dream

i had a dream that i was hanging out with my ex-boyfriend from age 15 (i've been with my husband since age 16, so this is the most significant ex i have). we just happened to be at the same place at the same time and i wondered if we'd talk. in awake life, he's become aloof in recent years, even when i've contacted him superficially on facebook and invited him to my wedding (i guess that could have been awkward...eek). no, not aloof. unresponsive. so in my dream i was rather surprised that he was very warm and happy to catch up. i was very open to this friendly exchange which surprises me in my awake state. i think i'd be a little bitchy, actually. so that was that.

then i met up with an old friend from middle school who in awake life i "unfriended" on facebook. i know - - -i'm not really into this type of drama but it was before i knew that i could "hear less" from individuals on facebook and her constant status messages about getting wasted were really annoying me. and i kind of have a quiet little rule where i won't be friends with anyone who can't even say hello when requesting to be my friend (which was the case with her). or adds me when i ask, and doesn't respond to my hello. right?! so back to the dream. it was awkward, basically.

so that's the theme of the day, i suppose.

Shooting Dogs and the Like

Last night's dream was WEIRD. Before I fell asleep I played World of Warcraft for the first time for a couple of hours.

WOW-induced dream:

My companion and I were wondering around a land and people kept shooting at us. Another couple, to be precise. They were across the street and we were hiding behind some bushes. They were standing near a street sign so to scare them I shot the street sign which then fell down. It worked! But in all of this shooting, I killed a dog by mistake. Then we were in a college dormitory and an official guy came up to us with a picture of the dead dog. I was very nervous that we were caught but he just wanted to let us know about the situation.

Later my family wanted us all to go to some farm together, but I did not want to go. I wanted to stay at home. My mom was mad at me for this. I also wet the bed a lot (in my dream! not real life!) and was embarrassed and wanted them to leave so I could hide the evidence. (similar theme to my last dream about Poop and Boyz!)

I also had sex with a girl who kept blowing in my ear. For some reason there was a lot of weird sexual stuff related to people blowing in each others ears.

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Poop and Boyz - warning gross

There was a dreamy foreign boy who wrote his number on my arm. Since he was foreign it was a long number - like 30 digits. In between lines of numbers he wrote little notes in beautiful handwriting. It was very poetic. I went up to the bathroom and pooped a lot. But not just the normal way, but also out of my mouth. A lot. It was less gross that it sounds, but I was worried about other people seeing it (it was in the garbage can). It was Halloween and there was candy everywhere but I noticed that I was not interested in the candy or festivities. Instead I got a ride from my parents, realized I left the poop in the garbage can, and ran back to dispose of it discretely. My parents drove me to pick up D. I showed her the number that the dreamy foreign guy wrote on my arm and she laughed and we decided to call him. We met up with him in the rain. He was very flirty and kind. Until he turned evil and put something on my back that felt like a staple. It hurt really bad and I realized he put a tracking device on me. He could hear everything I was saying so I could not call the police or an ambulance. It was all very stressful.

Monday, March 16, 2009

Tag Team Wrestling

I dreamed I was about to compete in a big tag team wrestling match with my friend Mark from college. He was waiting for me on one side of the ring while I got my outfit together. I wore these really tight shiny bright royal blue warmup pants and a matching blue t-shirt. I also had on a ton of glittery yellow eye shadow and matching tights, also glittery yellow. I also wore a cape.

I approached the ring, slowly getting terrified because I have no idea how to wrestle. Even worse, I realized that Mark and I were up against Larry Sweeney, who would obviously beat us. Larry, being a gentleman as always, quickly tried to teach me some moves. I got distracted, however, when I realized the crowd of about 12,000 people was booing me. I looked down and realized that my pants had the Chicago Cubs logo all over them. The crowd was booing because they hated the Cubs! Dicks...

Couch surfing

I was in San Fransisco. I was there with Becky. And with my old friend from high school, Barbara. I think there were other people there from high school too. Maybe Kristin? Not sure. We got to San Fransisco and my guide was like "oh man, you have GOT to see this!" So we walked down the road and then I could see in the distance some running water and a couch floating on it. The water was on the side of the road. Like, it was built there. Kind of like a water ride. Where you sit in the boat and go down the roller coaster kind of ride. But the boats were couches. And there was all sorts of different couches that you could sit on. So we hopped on one and that's how we got a tour around San Fransisco. On a couch. In the water. By the way, I've never been to San Fransisco, and I think the city that I was modeling it after was Hartford, Connecticut.
We got to the end of the line and got off. There was a huge walkway that went down to a stage. It was so steep that there was no way to prevent yourself from running down. At the end I leapt onto the stage were I think some sort of college acting class was going on. The Professor said "ok, now that Daniella is here, lets get started" and she gave out some sort of plot but I can't remember what it was and she asked "ok, Daniella, do you want to be the director.. the writer.. or the actor?" and I said "writer" even though I actually can't write very well at all... and I knew that.
The dream gets a little blurry at this point...
I end up in a theater sitting next to Barbara watching a movie? a play? Not sure. I realize that I've forgotten something at home. So I leave my purse there, tell Barbara that I'll be right back, and I walk out of the theater. I walk back because the couch ride was closed for the day and I walk up to my house, which kind of resembled the home of a childhood friend. I walked in and saw a few guys who were in my graduating class... Bruce and Nate and oddly enough Jacob (who is a Madison friend). I demand that they tell me how they got into my house and then I am overwhelmed with terror that they might be my new roommate. And I tell them to get out and to never come back. Bruce hands me the key and they leave.
I text Barbara to ask her to make sure she grabs my purse if she leaves the theater. So on my way walking back I bump into Mark (another friend from high school) and I am overwhelmed with joy to see him. I go to hug him and he's like "woah woah woah. I don't hug" and I am really annoyed and kind of offended and he says "yeah, good to see you too" in a very monotone voice. A girl walks up behind me and he puts his arm around her and they walk away.

Thursday, March 12, 2009

dare i?

i watched some model contest show last night where a couple guys & gals had to dress up (or down) as pixies. i then had a dream that i was walking across a bridge in the woods and came upon a crowd of about 8 male pixies. they weren't sparkly or flamboyant or whatever. they were more mossy and masculine. i ended up doin' the deed with one of them, thinking that it would be okay with my hub because he'd be happy that i was feeling so good. mmm, mmM! this was a dream where i woke up wondering if i really had an orgasm. got a little skip in my step today!

A series of strange dreams

I had a dream I went to visit my sister in Illinois (who just had a baby) and while we were there she asked us (my other siblings and I) to take her out to get some groceries. My mom stayed at her house to watch the kids. We got to the store and all she wanted was five large water containers. Like the kind they use for office water coolers. So we went in search of them and at one point we walk by a mother and her son. And the mother is yelling at her son for some reason or another. And at one point she calls her son "a stupid motherfucking fat fuck". At which point Brenda (my sister who just had the baby) stops and says to her "I'm sorry, is that your son?" and the woman says "uh, yeah. What are you going to do about it?" and Brenda turns to the son and says "Don't let her make you feel bad. Its her fault that she didn't give you vegetables when you were growing up and probably just fed you fried chicken and fast food". The mother is then silent and Brenda walks away and I remember feeling really proud of her.

I also had a dream that I was at a concert but the only instruments that were being played were musical saws. It was a beautiful concert. In that dream I had my saw with me too and I was showing it off to people who went to my high school, specifically who were in band with me. I also had pipes from a pipe organ. And when asked about them I said "oh no no, that's for something else..." but I never said what it was for. And I'm not sure why I had them with me. I bumped into my coworker there, who had ordered some books from someone about music theory, which is odd because this coworker listens mostly to techno music from the UK. Anyway, he was also complaining a lot about someone who was there. But I'm not sure what it was about. And then I saw my old band teacher there. The one who denied me the position of drum major (and whom I occasionally still think of with a burning hate). He told me about how he had become a business owner selling books and cleaning houses. His assistant was with him. Who I recognized as this girl that I met at popfest a few years ago who was a feminist and totally awesome and I was disappointed that she had become his assistant. And I told him about all the amazing things I've done with myself since high school, trying to piss him off. He then gave me some books and said "Here, your friend Bessie ordered some books. Would you mind giving them to her?" I agreed. I remember also thinking about asking him about his friend who came to the high school to play guitar for the senior year musical, Footloose... because I remember this friend totally hitting on me and I thought he was really cute. But I decided against it.

Monday, March 9, 2009

Daily Menu

I dreamed I was reading this piece of paper that belonged to this guy I know a little bit. The first part had detailed his running schedule (how much he runs each day) and how he feels after. The second part was his daily menu. Here is what I remember:

Breakfast AM
2 Breakfast sandwiches (I took this to mean McDonalds egg mcmuffins or something along that line)
1 bar - chocolate cereal root beer

AM Snack
1 slice of gum - Juicy Fruit (but there was a picture of minty gum next to it!)

Lunch
Bread and Toast

I don't remember the rest, but I do remember that by dinner he wrote something like "You wouldn't believe how the full sets in," implying that he didn't even need dinner. I kept reading his meals, wondering what the hell kind of eating plan this was. Low carb? High bread? I just didn't get it!

Sunday, March 8, 2009

Elephant Tapping

I was watching a documentary about the character Olive in the movie Little Miss Sunshine. In this dream, Olive had won some big title (probably Little Miss Sunshine) and was now very well-known, which is why there was a documentary made about her. It was in black and white when it showed her younger days.

Olive's talent was "Elephant Tapping." It is my understanding that Elephant Tapping means sitting in shallow water (1-2 feet deep) on a beach with a baby elephant in your lap, lightly splashing water on either side of it. So imagine you're sitting on the sandy ground with water up to your chest, your legs stretched out wide, and there's an elephant in front of you, and your arms are around it, splashing water. Elephant Tapping.

At some point, the documentary's narrator said something like "Olive has been in these waters since she was no bigger than a baby elephant." It showed her in the shallow water at about four years old splashing water by herself as a herd of about 12 elephants swam by her in perfectly straight lines. They all had their trunks in the air and they were smiling.

Thursday, March 5, 2009

feijoada

my hub and i were in a restaurant, ordering, when the waitress said that they had feijoada. in my dream, i knew i was dreaming, so i realized that by the waitress knowing how to pronounce feijoada, i too, then, knew how to pronounce it. i don't recall how it was pronounced in the dream, nor do i know how to pronounce it in my awake state.

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

rodent creature

i opened a dresser drawer and inside were what looked like milkweed pods facing down. four in a row, from largest in the front to smallest in the back. i used some inanimate poking object to overturn the first one. when i did, a rodent-like creature sprung out of it and skittered around the whole house. at some point i was able to get a good look at it while it was standing still. it had a furry face and large-ish ears, a skeletal body (seriously, just bones) and a long tail. oh, and the best part? it had a freakishly long, skinny trunk. yes, like an elephant. but realllllly skinny and reallllly long. it curved upward. i feel like there was mutual hatred between myself and this thing but i didn't want to kill it. i was just disgusted by it and thought it was going to hurt me. i woke up and tried to draw the creature and it didn't so much turn out.

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Unsatisfying Breakfast

In my dream, I'd just met my mom in a restaurant. We were supposed to have breakfast together, but they'd just stopped serving it. She'd already ordered, so she was safe. My only two choices were "Meat Pie," which looked like a mixture of meatloaf and dirt, or "Berries and Cream," which was blackberries mixed into this whipped cream. I knew that it would taste just like this stuff my ex-boyfriend's Belgian father used to make...one of the most delicious things I've ever tasted.

Jacob was our waiter, but he kept looking at us and laughing, shaking his head, then going to other tables. Everything was loud and crowded, and I kept thinking to myself "It's breakfast! All I want is an egg sandwich!"

The next day, in real life, I had a delicious breakfast: a garden skillet with two eggs over medium. It totally made me feel better about the dream.