Scary Sexy Superheros

I was in the woods with 3 friends. I don't know who they were. We were camping, but then saw some terrifying things. Evil Superheros were gathering, all in amazing costumes, flying, and easily killing things. We decided to join them and be spies. I had to wear a hat and wig so they wouldn't recognize me as not one-of-them. We did a "practice run" of evil, that was surprisingly easy. We had to kill some small animals and I found that in this group's presence I could kill easily and even fly a little. Not bad! The woods we were hanging out in were really scary, with haunted trees and caves. These evil scary superheros were actually pretty cool. The leader was an extremely sexy woman. I came up to her and whispered in her ear that I would love to sleep with her and that I was really awesome in bed. Really. Somehow that worked, and she said, "Okay meet me at 3pm on Friday and we'll do it then." When the time came I was very excited and kept adjusting my hat and wig, and started to worry that she would find out that I was a mere mortal and not a superhero, though still good in bed. Unfortunately, she didn't show up.

Scary World Take-Over

I went to high school (I AM ALWAYS IN HIGH SCHOOL IN DREAMS!) and it was super chaotic, but no one would tell me what was going on. I tried to ask a teacher, and she laughed like I was making a joke. After all, how could I *not* know that it was the apocolypse? We weren't allowed to leave, but I needed to see my family. So I ran to my car and drove down a street where all these scary guys in black and orange uniforms were shooting at me with machine guns. Actually they were shooting everywhere. Somehow I managed to get back to the school safe and sound. The people there were like, "Uh, yeah DUH you're not supposed to be driving around cuz you'll OBVIOUSLY get shot." Some people called them terrorists. But it almost seemed like they were not quite human. They were taking over the area and just shooting up everything and everybody. Their war tactics were superior to anything we had, and all police interventions were futile. I dove through some bushes and wore all black. I crept up upon them. I wanted to check out these assholes up close. Almost immediately they caught me. I threw my hands up. "I SURRENDUR!" I started to beg for my life and started to bargain with one of the more sympathetic seeming dudes. I told him I had not only a regular DVD player to give him that he could sell, but I also had a fancy DVD player that could play VHS, DVDs, and some 3rd type of technology. He seemed interested and hesitated. I also offered him my body which he was not interested in. He let me walk ahead of him to give him these goods. Then some of his war buddies started shouting - they needed his help. "Wait here!" he commanded. But as soon as he turned the corner, I RAN as fast as I could, into a random house and hid in a closet.

BeatleJuice

I dreamed I was in BeatleJuice. It wasn't a movie, it was real life. Beatle Juice was very scary.

What's Grosser Than Gross?

This dream is grosser than gross, friends. Consider yourself warned.

I dreamed about my scar from a brown recluse spider bite. The scar is a keloid, it's huge and on my upper right thigh and totally cute. I'm kidding. It's actually not that bad but people definitely react when they see it and hear that it is the result of me being attacked by a poisonous spider.

So in the dream there was this corn syrup and rubbing alcohol mixture that was dripping everywhere. I was wearing shorts and some got on my thigh right near my scar. As it dripped down my leg and the flesh across the top of my scar sizzled like it was being burned by acid- but in my mind it felt really good. The scar immediately started oozing - thick yellowish puss started flowing from the old wound. I got a napkin to clean it up but so much was coming out it was impossible, and now the puss had streaks of blood in it too. So I got a cup and started collecting the puss. (VOMIT, I know!!!)

In the end my scar was all flat and small and pink. And I felt incredibly relieved.

Failing School and Scary Animals

I keep having dreams about forgetting to go to class and failing. Last night I was in college and taking 3 classes, 2 of which I were getting F's in. I planned to stay up all night cramming for the exam in one of them to at least pass the class. And I was upset because I was failing 2/3 of my classes, so why bother paying for all this school? *

Also there were scary animals - kind of like eels. I kept capturing them and trying to kill them, but they would divide and wriggle away. I've had lots of scary animal dreams, especially about fish (since recently aquiring a pet goldfish).

*I've been done with school for 4 years. When will I stop dreaming about it?

The Hell's Satans

I don't remember my dream very well, but I know I was hanging out with some friends from high school. At one point, one of them said he thought I hated him in high school. I hugged him and said no, I never hated him, I was just socially awkward. We had a slumber party. One friend brought an inflatable water bed. At 9:30 in the morning we got drunk on vodka tonics to the point where I spilled mine. He looked at me and said, "Normally I'm not self-destructive like this." There was a tone of judgement in his voice.

Then we went to a tavern with a group of friends, some from college. We wanted to see the band play, and then suddenly it was beautiful classical music in a fancy music hall. One of my friends, J, who I have not seen in several years brought in a sandwich from Subway. She took off the plastic wrap and it was REALLY LOUD and crinkly, and everyone stared at her until she got kicked out. She was extremely upset, so I walked her and her baby (who suddenly appeared) home.

When we were walking home we passed a few guys who looked very tough. Lots of tattoos. They were very scary. Okay, in real life I wouldn't see a biker with a lot of tattoos and get scared. But in my dream they were terrifying. I knew they were white supremacists, violent, and evil. Something happened when we passed them, I can't remember what, but it pissed them off. So I knew they were after us. They were going to kill us! I looked them up online and their "bike gang website" proved how evil and violent they were. I was in a panic, making phone calls, gathering belongings, we had to get out of there!!!! I can't remember how it ended.

Bible Study and WOW

I was a student. One of my assignments was to go to a school in the next town which was known for being a little "strange." First I spied on the school to see what I was getting into. Over the hill and looking down on a large building with people walking around. Looked normal.

I went into a classroom and sat down. The first half of the class was Bible study and the teacher scolded me for not knowing which passage to read. The second half of the class was playing World of Warcraft.

I left during this time to go to an administrative office. I found that one of the small rooms near the office had a "spooky feel" to it and that it was brain-washing everyone who worked there.

So I needed to get into battle. Buffy the Vampire Slayer showed up for a bit, but her attitude was, "Um, really? You need help fighting spooky religious school teachers?" and she was kind of a stuck up bitch.

Lost and a Play

It's a long one...get ready...

I dreamed that I was sitting outside a cabin with a bunch of people. We sat around a fire. I think it was my family and then some people I vaguely knew. Things felt weird, sort of socially uncomfortable, and like people weren't totally happy being there. Some people were having silent disagreements. I was nervous.

I'm not sure how it transitioned into this next part, but somebody told me that my friend C was inside the cabin and he wasn't okay. I thought they meant he was dead. I ran inside to find my brother dozing in and out of sleep on the couch, and my friend C laying on the floor. He looked at me and was crying. He was telling me "I can't do this anymore." Then he was in an old-timey-looking armchair. I held on to him and he cried and sweated and I kissed him on the shoulder. I told him he needed to keep trying other things. The room was dark with only the light flickering from the television, and Emil was there this whole time.

After a really long period of silence, I put my hand over one of his, and they started convulsing insanely. I removed my hand. At this point the entire "foyer" of the cabin filled with my parents and all these strangers, all old fashioned looking. It was like the entire cast of Oliver Twist or something. They kept telling me that it was time, that they'd have to take him. I knew they meant to a mental institution. My mother looked at me sadly and I knew she agreed that he had to go. I screamed and debated and carried on. I don't think I've ever screamed like this in real life. I begged for just a little more time to fix him myself. One man, the ringleader, had an olde timey mustache and tiny, round glasses (he would have talked like "yeah, see? That's the ticket!"). He pointed a black umbrella in the air, and the umbrella grew to be about ten feet long. It had a really sharp point, and I knew they were going to stab C with it if I didn't do anything.

Everything faded out.

All of a sudden, I'm at an effing play with my family, sitting in the front row. I couldn't follow the story line, but there were a ton of princes, and it may have been loosely based around Cinderella. The evil stepmother was dressed like I Dream of Jeanie, but in green. At the end of the play, there was a "Procession of Queens," one from each country of the world. I tried to identify them by their outfits, but the only one I was sure of was The Queen of the North Pole because she was dressed all in red with white furry accents, a la Santa Claus.

After that, one of the actresses leaned right over my mother. My mother put each of her index fingers on the actresses shoulders and gently pushed her away. "Wait," the actress mouthed to my mother. I looked up to see C, about to fly on stage on a zip line. He wore a white undershirt and black pants. He flew in, right behind this actress, and landed in front of us, but there was definitely no zip line - this guy was flying, for real. The final dance number happened, and C beat on this drum and on the floor and on the railing that separated us, all with his bare hands, and cried from happiness. He looked straight at my mother and thanked her over and over again.

After the play, I found myself walking alone, trying to get somewhere in Chicago. I saw the river and walked alongside it, but got terribly lost. I kept asking people which direction was west, and people would laugh, or be like "Oh you're WAY off," or tell me to find Boston Rd. And one man told me that we were too remote. "I just want to know which way is west!" I said, almost crying. "I'm having a really hard day!" He ignored me and walked away.

I finally went into a 7-11 or something like it and talked to the manager. He was about 22 or so and had really curly blonde hair. I also told him that I was having a hard day. He was really nice and gave me a free ice cream and walked outside with me for awhile. He pointed me in a direction under a tunnel and told me to find Boston Rd. He said once I found Boston Rd, I'd be fine. He also gave me his card so that we could see each other again. I walked for what seemed like hours, feeling really alone and lost and unsure until I finally saw the Chicago skyline and felt better. At least I recognized something...

I woke up to a piercing smoke alarm and felt sad and exhausted for awhile. But looking back now, the funny parts are really effing funny, you know? And C in a musical? Awesome.

Whale Sharks and My Family

I was on vacation with my family - parents and siblings. We were on some beach that I think was maybe in Florida. We'd just arrived and decided to go swimming. There was this body of water that was like a combination of a lake and a pool, and there were four "whale sharks" swimming in it. They did not look like what real whale sharks do in real life...



...they were dark, almost black, glossy, and a bit bigger than a beluga. Although somebody told me there were four of them in there, I only saw three.

My father caught my attention and beckoned me over to where he was. There was a separate room with the "hot tub" in it - it was really just a smaller pool surrounded by large rocks and encased in glass, like a greenhouse. There was steam rising off the surface of the water. One whale shark swam in this water. My father was on the edge of the pool opposite from where I stood. Without speaking, he told me "watch this." He raised his hand high in the air and waved. The whale shark mimicked him with its tail. It imitated my dad so closely that it's tail changed shape; his tail looked just like a glossy, black version of my father's hand, five fingers and all. They were like mirrors of each other.

My father did many other hand motions, all of which the whale shark imitated with its tail. Very late in this whole production, I noticed that there was a third hand coming out of the pool, and it was the hand of a gorilla. I thought to myself "that's impossible, how could there be a gorilla under there?" Immediately after that thought, Emil confirmed it. "The tour guide told me it's true," he said.

I kept watching my father, wondering at how he could make the whale shark's tail do all these different formations. I was also very nervous about my father being so close to the water, since he can't swim (which has inspired other dreams). He got wet, but didn't fall in. He was wearing a suit.

Later, we were in my sister's front yard in Atlanta, where all of her living room furniture was placed in a very organized fashion. We were deciding what to give away. I chose a broken lamp. My father pointed a television remote control at nothing and a light turned on. It was dusk, and the air felt damp. The light was hazy and there were shades of purple everywhere. My mother sat in an easy chair and read. Everything felt very peaceful and calm.

Proving Ourselves

So in my dream, I'm a kid, but also my present age, and I'm with my immediate and extended family at "an old friend's house." In real life, I feel like it was my parents very old friends, the Kumars (Dr. Kumar sold my parents their first house for a buck or something and their son was a county supervisor here in Madison until last year). But the family we were visiting did not look like the Kumars. They were Indian, however. Just a different family.

There were two men in their twenties and one who was a teenager, maybe about 13 or 14 (the sons of the family we were visiting). While our parents sat in the dining room talking, the older sons came into the side room of the house where my siblings and cousins and myself were. The two men were holding machine guns and had bandanas around their heads that looked curiously like what Ralph Macchio wore in the The Karate Kid.

The two men announced that we were about to play a game to "prove ourselves." They headed out to the giant, dark backyard, guns in hand, and we all kind of looked at each other. Their younger brother got ready to go meet them, and we all knew he was about to get shot because nobody was as good at the game as the older brothers were. He looked devastated and full of dread as he slowly walked outside.

My siblings and cousins and I sat around, half watching television and half talking about why we shouldn't have to participate in this game. We kept saying things like "Isn't it time to leave anyhow?" And "We should check with the parents to see if we can get a ride home." We knew our turn was coming though.

At some point, one of the older men brought my friend D into the room and held him up against a dark green door. He used some thing on him that looked like it shocked him, and then something else that looked like a nail gun. He put the nail gun right up to D's chest and shot it. We knew D wasn't hurt or dead - he had just lost the game.

Finally we went into the room where all the parents were, which was bright and pink and yellow, full of cakes that were pink and white. The carpeting was yellow too. "Why didn't you guys get dessert?" my mom asked?

Then we left.