Thursday, December 31, 2009

Nothing Better to Do

I was at some kind of school assembly that was taking place in a big field. There were hundreds of chairs organized in very neat rows, and a big square stage at the center of them all. I sat down in a row right behind some of my friends. Some music started playing, and even though I didn't recognize it, I knew when to begin singing and what lyrics and tune to sing. As soon as I started singing, I realized it was "Rosanna" by Toto. I looked up to check out the band that was playing it, and realized the lead singer of this band was the actual lead singer from the band Toto! I thought to myself, "he probably has nothing better to do." Also, he looked nothing like him in real life.

Later, my row of chairs was removed from the group by some kind of forklift, and then I was in the car with my brother Emil and cousin Luai, looking for a wedding gift for a cousin of ours in London. We drove to a part of Madison I'd never been to. There were several Arabic stores and a Home Depot. The street name started with the letter B. Emil picked out an ugly necklace as a gift, which I didn't really like, but I kept my mouth shut because I was bored and wanted to leave the store.

Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Choreographed Dance


I was abroad. A semester somewhere in Africa. I rode an elephant on the highway. He could go up to 45 mph. It was really fun.

Then I was at home on vacation. Some girl had a great idea. She decided to make our cats do a choreographed dance! We dressed them in nun outfits and they sang and danced. I said, "my mom will LOVE this - she loves singing nuns." This morphed into a group of college students doing a choreographed dance for their parents. It became huge. The song was very generic, but the audience knew it and sang along. I had the great idea to do a "punk rock verse" after the normal version of the song. I gave one of the performers a denim jacket I had in college with some band patches on it.

The show went great. I was the conductor, but instead of a stick I had some long dangly thing that kept hitting me in the arm. The students did great and each time they sang it it was bigger and better. At the end they got into a pyramid and held up flags. Then...Punk rock version! I shouted "1-2-3-4!" and they all danced around and for some reason stripped down to their underwear.

Afterwards we ate dinner and someone's dad saw one of the performing college students walking home in the snow in just his boxers. He said, "That guy is an idiot."

Tuesday, December 29, 2009

I'll Never Get Into Harvard


I got my fingers pierced. One finger on each hand. Kind of like a gem on the finger minus the ring. Later it turned into pierced wrists, like a stud on the outside of each wrist. It actually looked really cool. Kind of like this picture, but not quite.

I was hanging out with my college friends. We were all getting dressed up and showered and ready to go out. Helen said some nuns flirted with her. Someone I went to college with and can't remember her name right now was mad at me because she knocked on the door but I did not hear it so she had to wait. Sorry!

While I was in the shower, something weird and sexual happened. This girl I have not seen in probably 4 years saw me and informed me that due to the sexual incident, she would not be my friend anymore. I denied anything that happened, but she looked at me with pity and said no more friendship.

Then we were all at Harvard then at a fancy luncheon. I spilled my water or coffee all over the table. I got as many napkins as I could to clean it up, but it was quite a mess. This official lady came over to whisper to me, "Are you okay?" I said sure, I was fine. She looked at me with pity and said, "Well...The spilling thing..." And it was clear I could kiss my chance at Harvard good bye.

Thursday, December 24, 2009

The Brother Totonchi

I dreamed that I was meeting Emil, Reem's brother (and Sarah's, though I've not yet met Sarah either), for the very first time.  For some reason I was in a hurry and really did not have time for this visit but thought I'd pop in briefly.  When I got there (Reem's place?), they were sitting around a tv.  I was introduced and then said that I had to get going pretty soon.  Emil begged me to stay, saying that we had to play some video game together.  I don't especially enjoy being put on the spot to play video games I've never played with people who play them all the time (in awake life) but I didn't want to be rude.  I stayed and played a game or two and Emil was soooo happy.  He was smiley and bouncy.

Monday, December 21, 2009

A Day in DeKalb

I dreamed I was with my friend Genia, visiting her hometown of DeKalb, IL. I've been to DeKalb numerous times in real life, but in my dream, I never had. In this dream, it was a booming city, really; there were two very tall buildings, one of which was painted with white and multi-colored checkers on the outside. We drove around in a car and I sat in the backseat with my head out the window like a dog, and I was fascinated with the city streets we passed.

Down one street, it looked like an olde-timey sort of area; old brown brick buildings with awnings and a lot of pharmacies. This one street had about 300 signs coming off buildings. Like this:



They each said the name of what kind of business it was, like "DENTIST," "STORE," "SHOES," and "TOYS," all in capital letters and written vertically. They were al different colors and overlapped with each other. It was amazing.

Down another street was two gigantic casinos. In a third location there was a coffee shop that's entrance was a giant octopus. Sort of like the Vortex in Atlanta, who's entrance is a giant skull:



There was other stuff that went on, but it mostly involved Genia and I drinking in a shitty bar and meeting two guys who tried to steal my two dollars worth of quarters. I'm not gonna dignify those dicks with anymore attention. So there!

Thursday, December 17, 2009

The Longest Fart

Uh oh! I had a dream in which I was laying on a couch and my friend was sitting on the floor. I knew I had to fart, so I let out just a teensy bit, but it ended up being really loud! As soon as I realized it would be loud, I said "fuck it" and let it fly on its own - NO LIMITATIONS. TO THE EXTREME. Anyhow, that fart lasted forever! It just didn't stop! My friend looked up at me and said "Whoa!" and I was laughing and saying "I know! I know!" but I couldn't stop farting. It was one extremely long fart without a break. I think it must have lasted a couple of minutes.

Friday, December 11, 2009

Never Ending Store

I was shopping for a xmas gift for my gf. I went into a "cool" store that had like band t-shirts and cds and stuff. I was looking at the t-shirts for a while. Then I walked around the store. It grew and grew. I went down a level and saw beer. One of my old students was there looking at beer and we talked. Then I went back up to the shirts and looked at sex toys but they were very expensive and I knew some of the people in the store so I was self-conscious. I went back down a level. It was HUGE. I said, "I never knew this part of the store existed!" Someone said, "This floor is only open on Fridays." I was walking very fast; kind of stressed because I wanted to find the perfect gift and only had a certain ammount of time. There were stoned people everywhere. The nice chill ladies working said, "Chill out, take your time." They were selling very weird pipes and bongs with "legal bud". Some teenagers bought some and I asked if it was any good - they said yes but you had to smoke it "on the right axis." I tried to smoke some but they only had really weird looking pipes. I tried one that looked like a bird. One was really long and skinny like a chop-stick. Then I kept walking around the store. In one section they were giving someone tattoos. Then I found a cool row of weird toys. They were really cool looking - stuffed strawberries with faces and things. Kind of like these:
but different. Finally I left to go home and opened my bag. All I bought was a stupid obscure band t-shirt for some group I never even heard of. My gf wouldn't like that.

Thursday, December 3, 2009